Tag Archives: Dairy

Paleo Carrot Cake w/ Maple Cream Cheese Frosting

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So I’m finally back east with the fam…and just like every year, Mother’s Day and my dad’s birthday fell right next to each other and we had a nice little celebration.  Good dinner, good wine, good cake.

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Ah, cake.  My favorite dessert in the whole wide world is cake.  OK, no…it’s the frosting.  But you know, cake is the mighty vessel upon which it rests in all its gooey glory.

So carrot cake has always been my Dad’s favorite (and, incidentally, mine) so it’s seriously been the go-to every year.  No, really…every year.  So I had big shoes to fill since I’m pretty sure everyone we know has had their had some year or another…some years we ordered special from fancy bakeries…some years we totally forgot and ended up grabbing a pre-made one at Safeway…and, obviously, Mom has made more than a few and it felt like every year she’d do something a little different (nuts vs. no nuts…pineapple vs. no pineapple…etc).

I know generally how to make a carrot cake…but just like making a Paleo version of anything you love, there’s a lot of pressure not to f*ck it up when cooking for your very-not-Paleo-family..  I’m moving away from my general formula for cakes and cupcakes and muffins and other bread-y baked goods to be, you know, creative and all…and also just to experiment with texture.  I’m a huge believer in changing up your repertoire and trying new things in the kitchen since, sure…you might have a tried and true recipe for Mom’s Apple Pie that might be “good,” but not “great”?  I’ve had waaaaaay to many of someone’s mom’s or grandmothers cookies that they swore were the best ever…unmatched past, present, and future…and honestly, dude, not THAT great.  Sorry.

I based this cake recipe off of the infamous vanilla cake over at Pretty in Primal.  To date, it really is the best plain vanilla cake I’ve had, and like any good white or yellow cake recipe, you can personalize it in a million different ways.  The texture is moist…like stick-to-you-fork-moist.  Most of my cakes and muffins of old are primarily coconut flour and egg-based, which is fine, but like I said I wanted to get crazy and see what happened.

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At the very least, I knew that if the cake sucked, I could always hide it under gobs of cream cheese frosting.  That’s pretty much my solution for everything in life.

But in case you were wondering, it didn’t suck.  In fact, Dad went back for seconds and said it was one of the best carrot cakes he’d every had…period.  For a man who’d had it every year for his birthday for…a lot of years…that sure made my day :-)

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Paleo Carrot Cake w/ Maple Cream Cheese Frosting
Author: 
Prep time: 
Cook time: 
Total time: 

Serves: 6
 

Ingredients
  • For the Cake:
  • ½ c Coconut Flour
  • ½ c Almond Meal
  • ½ t Salt
  • ½ t Baking Soda
  • ½ c Maple Syrup (or honey)
  • 2 t Vanilla
  • 4 Eggs
  • ¾ c Full Fat Coconut Milk
  • 3 Large Carrots, grated
  • ½ t Cinnamon
  • ½ t Nutmeg
  • ½ c Chopped Walnuts
  • ½ c Chopped Dates
  • For the Frosting:
  • 8 oz Cream Cheese
  • ¼ c Maple Syrup
  • 3 T Full Fat Coconut Milk

Instructions
  1. Note: This recipe made one, 9-inch cake layer that I split in two. Double the recipe for additional layers.
  2. Whisk all of your dry ingredients together in a large bowl.
  3. Add the wet ingredients (except the cream cheese, extra syrup, and coconut milk for the frosting) and beat on low with an electric mixer until everything is well combined.
  4. Pour into a greased and parchment-lines baking pan.
  5. Bake at 350 degrees for 30-35 minutes, until a toothpick comes out clean.
  6. Cool completely and frost with the Maple Cream Cheese Frosting.
  7. To make the frosting, bring the cream cheese to room temperature and beat well with the maple syrup and coconut milk.

 

“Cake Batter” Breakfast Yogurt

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I’m totally jumping on the “cake batter” wagon.  Although part of me really really wants to rant about how annoying it is that food and fitness bloggers seem to think that it’s OK to make up “healthy cake batter protein shakes” or “healthy cake batter pudding” or “healthy cake batter…whatever” that are flavored with yellow cake mix or instant pudding or artificial, chemical-laden imitation flavor extracts–I won’t.  Because I made my own “cake batter” thing and I’m super proud of it, so I’m not really in an asshole-ish mood this morning.

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Let’s get one thing straight, though–we all know my stance on dairy, so it SHOULD go without saying that if you’re intolerant or are abstaining from dairy, then this recipe is not for you.  Lately I’ve been experimenting with goat’s dairy and have really been pleased.  Unlike cow’s dairy, it doesn’t mess with my skin or my energy levels, and for many people with some moderate intolerance toward cow’s dairy seem to do better on goat’s dairy products.  (Want more info on the Great Dairy Debate, check out the articles here, here, and here).

OK so let’s get to the good stuff.  What makes something “cake batter”-y?  It’s actually pretty simple.  You need a creamy element, a sweet element, a vanilla element, and a buttery element.  Since I’m not lazy or dense enough to think that yellow cake mix is a “healthy” option, I had to experiment a little.  The yogurt base was obvious (if you’re cool with it, full-fat Greek yogurt would be good, too), and then I got all meathead-like and used vanilla protein (still addicted to SPN).  The buttery part was a challenge, but I settled on some pure almond extract and it works beautifully.  And finally, because I clearly couldn’t use sprinkles, I settled on some raw, unsweetened carob chips as a garnish…I’m obsessed with them, btw…they’re like, chocolate-y but almost coffee-ish, too.  Like, the two things that make life worth living.  On top of something that tastes like cake batter.  Best.  Breakfast.  Ever.

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“Cake Batter” Breakfast Yogurt
Author: 
Prep time: 
Total time: 

Serves: 1
 

Ingredients
  • 1 c Goat Milk Yogurt (full-fat)
  • 1 Mashed Banana
  • 1 scoop Vanilla Protein Powder
  • ½ t Almond Extract
  • 1 T Carob Chips (or other garnish)

Instructions
  1. Mix the yogurt, banana, protein, and extract in a bowl.
  2. Top with carob chips.

 

Brown-Butter-Sage-Roasted-Winter-Squash-Sweet-Potato Lasagna

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OMG I actually made something edible last night.

Well, first, I should say that a big, fat “Happy Birthday” is in order for my wonderful husband.  I still haven’t figured out why he likes me but I love the sh*t out of this guy.  Born in the fall…sweet but a little spicy…oh, so cheesy…likely to age extremely well…yeah, this lasagna is Ross in food form.

Well, I can’t take all the credit.  Or any of it really…as I often do, I was floundering for something special to make and Jessica came to the rescue again.  I mean…lasagna that tastes like fall?  Um, yes, please.

And no, that’s not nasty-ass “real” pasta.  It’s Capello’s.  If you haven’t tried it, please do…it’s pretty damn good and gluten-free—and almostPaleo!  (It does contain potato starch).  I ordered a case of the stuff and am eagerly looking forward to the end of my competition prep so I can try the fettuccini and gnocci, too.  I mean…pasta that won’t make my insides explode?  Have I died and gone to Heaven?  Actually…yes.  My kitchen smells like Heaven in autumn.

INGREDIENTS

(adapted from this recipe)

1 pkg Capello’s Lasagna Noodles

½  Winter Squash, cubed and peeled (I used Acorn Squash)

2 Sweet Potatoes, cubed

2 T Olive Oil

Salt and Pepper to taste

1/4 teaspoon nutmeg

12 oz Mascarpone Cheese, room temperature

¼ c Pastured Butter

1 Shallot, thinly sliced

3 Cloves Garlic, minced

1 1/2 c Fresh Parmesan, grated

Fresh Mozzarella, grated or thinly sliced (use as much as you like!)

1 T Dried Sage

INSTRUCTIONS

**Filling:  Combine squash, sweet potato, olive oil, salt, pepper, and nutmeg. Lay in a baking dish and roast for 50 minutes at 350 degrees, tossing every 15 mins.  Cool completely, then place in a food processor.  Don’t puree it completely, but make it smooth with small lumps.

Now for the cheesy part!  Melt the butter over medium heat in a skillet. Add the shallots and garlic, continuing to stir or whisk for a few minutes.  When the butter is browned, remove from heat and cool.  Beat the mascarpone, half of the Parmesan cheese, and the browned butter/shallot/garlic mixture until fluffy.

**Assembly:  Grease an 8×8 baking dish.  Place a layer of lasagna noodles on the bottom (keep in mind Capello’s are no-cook). Spread the squash not-quite-puree on top.  Then spread a layer of the mascarpone mixture.  Spread a layer of mozzarella.  Repeat as many times as you can/want/whatever.  Sprinkle sage on top…the original recipe uses a bunch of fresh sage leaves, and that’s probably your best bet…I’m just cheap ;)

Bake at 350 degrees for 40-45 minutes, until browned on top and bubbly.  Remove from the oven and let rest for 10 minutes before serving.

Enjoy!

The Best Effing Protein Pancakes I’ve Ever Had

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Oh yeah, I’m 110% serious.

So this morning I fell out of the sky right on my ass and now it’s broken.  Well, to be fair I jumped out of a helicopter completely on my own accord.  And my ass is not broken, but bruised badly and it hurts to sit, run, bend over…you name it.  This is not good.  In fact, it sucks real bad.

But you know what makes everything better?  Motherf*cking pancakes, that’s what.

INGREDIENTS

1 Very Ripe Banana

1 Egg (or 2 egg whites)

1 scoop Vanilla Whey Protein Powder

1 T Ground Flax

1/4 t Vanilla

INSTRUCTIONS

Mash the banana and beat the egg, protein powder, flax, and vanilla to make a batter.

Cook over medium-low heat for 2-3 minutes on one side till browned, then flip and repeat.  This recipe makes 3 big pancakes.

Top with almond butter or fruit.

**Nutrition Facts**

Calories:  284

Fat:  5.5 g

Protein:  30 g

Carbohydrate:  35 g

Primal Protein Pancakes

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Yeah, after a whole week of lean meat and egg whites for breakfast I was a hair short of a complete meltdown this weekend…thankfully, pancakes never fail to make everything–EVERYTHING–better.

I got my tub of Simply Pure Nutrients protein powder in the mail on Friday and ever since I’ve been going positively nuts trying to find every conceivable way to put it in everything–it’s THAT GOOD.  It’s got a coconut base and more fat than your run-of-the-mill protein powder, but I think that’s why it actually tastes good.  Funny how that works.

INGREDIENTS

(Serves 1)

1 1/2 T Coconut Flour

1 scoop Protein Powder (I use Simply Pure Nutrients Pro3 Synergy Fuel)

4 Egg Whites

1/4 t Baking Soda

1/2 t Vanilla

Toppings of Choice

INSTRUCTIONS

Beat your egg whites until frothy.  Add the coconut flour, protein powder, and vanilla and whisk until smooth.  Let stand for 5 minutes.

Heat a *lightly* greased skillet over medium heat.  Pour 1/4 c batter onto skillet, cook for 2-3 minutes on one side, then flip and cook for another 2 minutes.  Repeat with remaining batter.

For the topping pictured, heat 1/2 c blueberries in the microwave for 30 seconds.  Let cool slightly and pour over pancakes.

NUTRITION FACTS

(For pancakes only)

Calories:  224

Fat:  4.2 g

Protein:  31 g

Carbs:  12 g

Reuben Dog

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This is what my loving husband gets for leaving me all alone.  Again.

It was pretty much fate that dictated that I make this sandwich.  First, Ross calls me a couple weeks ago and raves about this Reuben Hot Dog he saw at the cafeteria at work.  And I totally forgot about it.  BUT!!  Then a week ago I see Adam Gertler on The Best Thing I Ever Ate raving about his awesome Reuben Dog.  Then I promised Ross that I’d find a way to make him a Paleo Reuben Dog if he didn’t leave me (again) to go back to Boston.  Then he left.  Jerk.

Some wives whine.  Some wives cry.  THIS wife gets her revenge via Reuben Dog that she will NEVER, EVER share with her husband.  He’s jealous, and I like it that way.  Not sorry.  OK, well I whined and cried, too.  A lot.

I AM sorry about the quality of the photos.  I tried SO HARD to convey the foodgasmic deliciousness but (aside from my not having a very professional camera) there’s no good way to make a baked sweet potato covered in Reuben Dog Goodness look sexy.  Just PLEASE trust me!

INGREDIENTS

(Serves 1)

**Sandwich**

1 Sweet Potato

1 T Butter

**Fillings**

1 Large Bratwurst Sausage

1/2 c Sauerkraut, thoroughly drained

1 Thick Slice Bacon, cooked and crumbled

1/2 c Shredded Gruyere Cheese (optional)

** Thousand Island Dressing**

1/2 c Paleo Mayonnaise

1/4 c Paleo Ketchup

1 Large Dill Pickle, minced

INSTRUCTIONS

Bake your sweet potato in foil at 425 degrees for 1 hour, 15 minutes.

Over medium-high heat, cook your bratwurst until done.  You can also roast it in the oven with the sweet potato for the last 20-25 minutes.

Remove sweet potato from the oven and allow to sit for 10 minutes, then slice it open.  Spread the butter on the inside of the sweet potato.

Add the crumbled bacon.

Add the cheese (optional).

Add the bratwurst.

Add the sauerkraut.

Smother in Thousand Island.

Stuff your face.

Let your jerk of a husband with his jerk of a travelling job know what they’re missing.

Pepperoni Pizza Pot Pie

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Oh.  Hell.  Yes.

Something about living by myself makes me want pizza.  All the fracking time.  And chocolate, too.  But mostly pizza…and on a Saturday night there’s no just no hope for me.

I had originally planned to work on another recipe I’ve had sitting on the books for a little bit–an Asian style chicken thing–but I really wasn’t feeling it.  You know, the whole pizza thing.  I figured I’d just do another one of these bad boys but dammit if I didn’t have any cauliflower left…Life is hard sometimes.

I really didn’t have much of anything, actually.  I do my shopping on Sundays so on a Saturday night it’s like a Greenwich Village Bachelor Pad in here.  Except a lone spaghetti squash on the counter…OK, creative juices flowing…didn’t PaleOMG make some kind of baked egg thing with one of these a while back?…OK I got some sauce and meat but damned if I’m not sick and tired of spaghetti squash and meat sauce…oh, lookie!  there’s some pepperoni in there, too…OMFG I’M A GENIUS.

You’re welcome.

Ingredients

1/2 Spaghetti Squash, cooked

1 1/2 c Tomato or Pizza sauce

1 lb Ground Sausage (beef would work, too)

1/2 Large Onion, sliced

4 Eggs

Salt and Pepper to taste

1 t Dried Basil

1 t Dried Oregano

1 Package Applegate Farms Pepperoni (or any other brand that is nitrate and crap free!!!!!)

Additional toppings of choice (I used more sausage, random chopped veggies, and fresh organic mozzarella*)

Instructions

Brown the sausage in a bit of oil and let cool slightly.

Place the spaghetti squash in a large mixing bowl with the sausage, tomato sauce, eggs, and seasonings.  Mix well and pour into a greased 2 QT baking dish.  Bake at 400 degrees for 30-35 minutes, until firm to touch and lightly browned.

Remove dish from the oven and add your toppings–sprinkle extra meat, veggies, cheese, and whatever else directly on the casserole and make sure you add the pepperoni last so it seals in all the flavor and makes a nice little “crust” on the outside.

Broil for an additional 5-7 minutes.  Enjoy!

*Yes, I put cheese on mine.  I only ever used certified organic, pastured dairy products–in the rare event that I do eat dairy–but to make this 100% Paleo instead of Primal, omit the cheese.  It will be just as good!

Shrimp Tacos w/ Jalepeno Cream Sauce

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If I’d have been thinking straight we could have had these on Tuesday…you know, Taco Tuesday??  *Sigh*

I’m not a spicy food person.  Like, really not a spicy food person.  Don’t get me wrong, I love a nice kick that comes from a hint o’ curry or pepper.  But then there’s the sado-masochistic lot of you that will happily shove 911-Hot-Wings in your mouth like candy corn.  Nope, not this girl…I don’t believe my food should cause me physical pain.

So, that brings me to the fiasco that was making these tacos.  I wanted to use some fresh jalepenos I picked up earlier in the week…but when you’re looking for just the right amount of heat it’s all too easy to end up with something either way bland or so hot you’ll be banished to the porcelain throne for a week.  Given the fact that I handle spicy food worse than I can handle anything with alcohol, my time in the kitchen wasn’t pretty, lemme tell ya.  You’re welcome, because both the shrimp and the sauce were perfect.  You’re welcome.

Ingredients

(Serves 2-4)

1 head Iceberg Lettuce

1 lb Shrimp, peeled and de-veined

1/4 c Lime Juice

2 T Fresh Cilantro, chopped

2 Jalepeno Peppers, sliced

Batter:

2 Eggs

1/3 c Arrowroot Powder

1/4 t Black Pepper

Olive Oil for frying

Jalepeno Cream Sauce:

2 T Olive Oil

1 Garlic Clove, minced

1/2 Onion, diced

1 Jalepeno, diced

1/4 c Lime Juice

1/2 c Fresh Cilantro, chopped

1 c Sour Cream

Instructions

First, prepare the cream sauce.  Heat oil over medium-high heat, then add the onions and garlic.  Saute until soft, then add the peppers and stir for 2-3 minutes.  Remove from heat and de-glaze the pan with lime juice.  Allow to cool.  Combine sour cream and cilantro, then add the jalepeno mixture and whisk together until smooth.  Cover and chill before use.

For the shrimp, marinate before cooking in the lime juice, cilantro, and peppers.  Do NOT leave in the marinade for more than 10-15 minutes, or the acid in the lime juice will cook the shrimp.

Beat the eggs, arrowroot powder, and pepper.  Heat the oil in a heavy-bottomed pan.  In batches, dip the shrimp in batter and place in the hot oil.  Cook for 1 minute on each side, then flip.  Drain on paper towels.  **I strongly suggest you dip some of the marinated jalepeno slices in batter and fry those up, too!

To assemble tacos, fill lettuce leaves with shrimp and top with cream sauce.  Add any other toppings you want (we used diced sweet peppers, tomato, and avocado).

Cauliflower “Mac” & Cheese + Metcon Monday

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Guess what?  I’m moving in 3 weeks!  And I have packed exactly zero of my stuff…I mean, I’ve actually never moved before (leaving college with a Kia Rio-full of crap doesn’t count) so maybe this is normal?

Anyway, instead of moving this weekend was rife with new good eats.  And yes, there was mac & cheese.  Because you’re just not an American if you don’t love mac & cheese.

Know what else?  There is cheese in my mac & cheese.  Good, high quality cheese.  Do not make this with crap cheese and say you got the idea from me.  I don’t tolerate milk very well, but I’m certainly blessed enough not to have a problem with cheese.  If you’re not OK with the Dairy Thang, I will not judge…just point out that this was really, really delicious.  Sorry.  You can do my Monday Metcon instead. See what I did there?  TGIPaleo [HEART]‘s Paleo/Primal Equal Opportunity!

Ingredients

4 Thick Slices Bacon

1 Can Coconut Milk

1 T Arrowroot Powder, dissolved in 1 T Water

4 oz Gruyere Cheese, grated

4 oz Raw Milk Cheddar, grated

1 t Black Pepper

1/8 t Nutmeg

1 Head Cauliflower

1/2 c Almond Meal

1/2 c Parmigiano Reggiano

Salt and Pepper to taste

Instructions

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees.

Chop the cauliflower into florets, then set aside.

Fry the bacon until crisp, then chop into bits.  Set aside.

Over medium heat, heat the coconut milk almost to a boil in a large saucepan or stockpot.  Whisk in the arrowroot powder and continue stirring until slightly thickened.  Remove from heat and whisk in Gruyere and Cheddar, then the pepper and nutmeg, and then the diced bacon.

Add the cauliflower and stir well to coat with the cheese sauce.  Pour everything into a baking dish.

Blend the almond meal and Parmigiano together and sprinkle over the mac & cheese.  Add salt and pepper to taste.  Bake at 400 degrees for 40 minutes.  Remove from the oven and let rest for 10-15 minutes before serving.

And now, Metcon Monday…these weights are what Ross and I did, respectively, so feel free to tweak as needed.  For time:

Row 1000m

30 Back Squats (95/45#)

30 Box Jumps (24/20″)

30 Back Squats (95/45#)

30 Box Jumps (24/20″)

1000m Row

Have fun!

The Subterranean

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I used to be the biggest Texas Hater.  I mean, really…it might have been my only memory of Texas until the age of 23 was visiting my Dad at the Galveston shipyard, swimming in the Gulf and coming out of the water covered in oil, and then falling onto a catus.  Or it might have been because I dated not one, not two, but three guys from Texas in college who all turned out not-so-great and smashed my poor little heart into a bazillion pieces.  Who knows?  All I know now is that as soon as I moved to Austin, that all changed.  I love it here and the fact that I’m leaving has me feeling a little bummed lately.

I’m sure Colorado is going to be awesome, too, don’t get me wrong.  Everyone I know who’s been to Carson loves it and I’m sure I will, too.  But Austin is such a unique place with some of the best food, music, people, and atmosphere I’ve ever seen.  Like my Dad exclaimed the first time he visited, “There’s more yoga studios per block than in San Francisco!”

OK back to the food.  Right after we moved here, Ross found House Pizzaria tucked back off of Airport Boulevard.  What originally caught our interest was the beer selection but they also had a very unique pizza menu.  The Subterranean is a succulent combo of rosemary roasted red potatoes, mushrooms, onion, basil, and fontina.  We were hooked.

Although the beer is no longer and option, last night we cracked open a bottle of red and paid homage to one of our Austin staples.

Ingredients

1 lb Ground Beef

1 lb Ground Chicken

2 Eggs

1 Large Sweet Potato

2 c Sliced Mushrooms

1 Medium Onion, sliced

1/4 c Fresh Basil

8 oz Shredded Fontina Cheese (optional)

2 t Rosemary

2 t Parsley

Salt and pepper to taste

Olive Oil for cooking

Instructions

Thinly slice the sweet potato (about 1/8-inch slices) with a knife or mandolin.  Lightly oil a baking sheet and arrange the slices, brushing the tops with oil sprinkle with rosemary.  Bake at 450 degrees for 10-15 minutes, until slightly browned.

In olive oil over medium-high heat, carmelize the onions.

Combine the meat with eggs, parsley, salt, and pepper.  Press onto a second baking sheet and bake for 10 minutes at 450 degrees.  Drain off excess liquid and blot the surface with a paper towel.

Cover the crust with the roasted potatoes, onion, mushrooms, basil, more rosemary, and cheese if desired.  Place under the broiler for 5-7 minutes.