Carmelized Banana Blondies w/ Rich Butter-Fudge Frosting (Dairy Free!)

Oh, East Coast summer…I didn’t miss you at all.  I can’t walk outside without my hair taking off in every direction and being covered in a sheen of sweat.  There’s no “feminine glow”…just nasty sweat.  Ew.  And what makes it worse is that I go to school with a pretty well put-together group…and not only did I never really learn to dress myself properly, but I walk and/or bike to class and here they all are, dressed up like they’re going to the yacht club and in walks the Swamp Thing.  Yup, real attractive.

OK, let’s talk about these little squares of heaven.  Something about chocolate, nuts, and carmelized bananas is just so…right.

banana blondies paleo

I originally called these “brownies” because that’s exactly what they reminded me of…rich, gooey (not cake-y!  Cake-like brownies are an abomination!!) little squares backed with bananas and nuts…except they clearly aren’t chocolate.  Well…they do have chocolate chips.  Is that enough?  I really don’t know where I’m going with this.

Oh, and obviously there is no butter in them, either.  But if you’ve never used cashew butter, I insist you do…you know how cashews are damned addictive because they just…melt in your mouth and taste so…buttery?  OK, well I guess mashing them up into a paste just enhances all of their awesomeness by like, a zillion.  Just…just do it.

Paleo Banana Blondies

One note on these…coconut manna (also known as coconut butter or coconut cream concentrate) is the key to the texture.  It’s smooth (not as grainy as many nut butters) and has a hint of coconut flavor that pairs sooooo well with the bananas.  However, even I have a hard time finding the stuff at times, so in a pinch any nut butter will do.  Do NOT use coconut oil.  For the frosting, in a pinch, just try plain old almond butter with a drizzle of honey.  It’s like a very naughty PB&B ;-)

Enjoy!

Banana Blondies w/ Rich Butter-Fudge Frosting (Dairy Free!)
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Serves: 8
 

Ingredients
  • Blondies:
  • 2 Bananas, sliced
  • 2 T Coconut Oil
  • ½ c Coconut Flour
  • 6 Eggs
  • ½ c Coconut Manna
  • ⅓ c Honey
  • 2 t Vanilla
  • ½ c Chopped Walnuts
  • ½ c Chocolate Chips (dairy-free, soy-free, etc)
  • Frosting:
  • ½ c Coconut Manna
  • ½ c Cashew Butter (any nut butter would be fine)
  • ¼ c Coconut Oil
  • ¼ c Honey

Instructions
  1. Heat the coconut oil over medium heat in a skillet.
  2. Add the bananas and sautee until fragrant and golden brown. Remove from heat.
  3. When bananas have cooled slightly, mash completely in a large mixing bowl.
  4. To the mashed bananas, add the coconut manna and honey and vanilla. Beat with an electric mixer until well combined.
  5. Add the coconut flour and eggs a bit at a time, beating well in between. When mixture is fully combined, beat for 2 minutes on high.
  6. Stir in the nuts and chocolate chips.
  7. Pour into a greased 8×8 baking pan.
  8. Bake at 350 degrees for 25-30 minutes, until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean.
  9. Frost with Butter Fudge Frosting…
  10. For the frosting, add all of the ingredients to a large mixing bowl.
  11. Beat with an electric mixer, slow at first to combine, then on high for three minutes, until fluffy.

 

Chocolate Chip and Candied Ginger Chip Cookies

Chocolate and ginger were made to be together.  Fact.

paleo cookies

So moving is going…well, it’s *going*, I guess.  We’re in the new house and living in a sea of boxes and paper while I sit in class all day re-learning 9 years of math over the next week.  By the time I get home it’s generally my habit to sit and stare at the wall for like half an hour and then shove some food down my pie hole, do homework till I get tired, then fall asleep watching The Tudors.  I’ve been disgustingly un-productive this week.  Then Ross got in yesterday.  Then I was all like, “Let’s make cookies!!”

Actually, we were going to be social last night but we both had a horrible day.  I won’t bore you with the deets but let’s just say it was obvious that the only thing to be done was to cry for a little while, then make cookies, drink wine, and fall asleep in front of the TV.  On a Friday night.  We are SO OLD.

happy husband

Ross was a happy boy.

The basic cookie recipe is my favorite chocolate chip recipe…then I added the ginger chips.  So original.  But this cookie recipe is perfect.  I think it’s the whole Paleo World’s favorite.  Bill and Haley are just so gosh darn smart!  But it’s incredibly versatile…you can play with all kinds of fillings or toppings or whatever you want, so when I found the ginger chips (didn’t even know there WAS such a wonderful thing!) there was no question.  If you don’t have ginger chips, just get some candied ginger and chop it up real small.  Easy!

While you’re waiting for these babies to come out of the oven, go ahead and eat the extra chocolate chips and ginger chunks out of a bowl with a spoon like a total fatty.  I won’t judge ;-)

chocolate and ginger

Chocolate Chip and Candied Ginger Chip Cookies
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Adapted from The Food Lovers’ Primal Palate
Ingredients
  • 3 c Almond Meal
  • ½ c Melted Coconut Oil
  • ½ c Honey
  • 2 Eggs
  • 1 t Baking Soda
  • 1 t Salt
  • 1 t Vanilla
  • 1 c Chocolate Chips
  • 1 c Ginger Chips (or chopped candied ginger)

Instructions
  1. Combine all ingredients in a large mixing bowl.
  2. Drop by spoonfulls onto a greased baking sheet.
  3. Heat the oven to 375 degrees.
  4. Bake for 12-15 minutes, until lightly golden on top.
  5. Devour shamelessly.
  6. Makes 12-18 cookies (we made jumbos!)

 

Paleo Carrot Cake w/ Maple Cream Cheese Frosting

So I’m finally back east with the fam…and just like every year, Mother’s Day and my dad’s birthday fell right next to each other and we had a nice little celebration.  Good dinner, good wine, good cake.

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Ah, cake.  My favorite dessert in the whole wide world is cake.  OK, no…it’s the frosting.  But you know, cake is the mighty vessel upon which it rests in all its gooey glory.

So carrot cake has always been my Dad’s favorite (and, incidentally, mine) so it’s seriously been the go-to every year.  No, really…every year.  So I had big shoes to fill since I’m pretty sure everyone we know has had their had some year or another…some years we ordered special from fancy bakeries…some years we totally forgot and ended up grabbing a pre-made one at Safeway…and, obviously, Mom has made more than a few and it felt like every year she’d do something a little different (nuts vs. no nuts…pineapple vs. no pineapple…etc).

I know generally how to make a carrot cake…but just like making a Paleo version of anything you love, there’s a lot of pressure not to f*ck it up when cooking for your very-not-Paleo-family..  I’m moving away from my general formula for cakes and cupcakes and muffins and other bread-y baked goods to be, you know, creative and all…and also just to experiment with texture.  I’m a huge believer in changing up your repertoire and trying new things in the kitchen since, sure…you might have a tried and true recipe for Mom’s Apple Pie that might be “good,” but not “great”?  I’ve had waaaaaay to many of someone’s mom’s or grandmothers cookies that they swore were the best ever…unmatched past, present, and future…and honestly, dude, not THAT great.  Sorry.

I based this cake recipe off of the infamous vanilla cake over at Pretty in Primal.  To date, it really is the best plain vanilla cake I’ve had, and like any good white or yellow cake recipe, you can personalize it in a million different ways.  The texture is moist…like stick-to-you-fork-moist.  Most of my cakes and muffins of old are primarily coconut flour and egg-based, which is fine, but like I said I wanted to get crazy and see what happened.

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At the very least, I knew that if the cake sucked, I could always hide it under gobs of cream cheese frosting.  That’s pretty much my solution for everything in life.

But in case you were wondering, it didn’t suck.  In fact, Dad went back for seconds and said it was one of the best carrot cakes he’d every had…period.  For a man who’d had it every year for his birthday for…a lot of years…that sure made my day :-)

Paleo Carrot Cake w/ Maple Cream Cheese Frosting
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Serves: 6
 

Ingredients
  • For the Cake:
  • ½ c Coconut Flour
  • ½ c Almond Meal
  • ½ t Salt
  • ½ t Baking Soda
  • ½ c Maple Syrup (or honey)
  • 2 t Vanilla
  • 4 Eggs
  • ¾ c Full Fat Coconut Milk
  • 3 Large Carrots, grated
  • ½ t Cinnamon
  • ½ t Nutmeg
  • ½ c Chopped Walnuts
  • ½ c Chopped Dates
  • For the Frosting:
  • 8 oz Cream Cheese
  • ¼ c Maple Syrup
  • 3 T Full Fat Coconut Milk

Instructions
  1. Note: This recipe made one, 9-inch cake layer that I split in two. Double the recipe for additional layers.
  2. Whisk all of your dry ingredients together in a large bowl.
  3. Add the wet ingredients (except the cream cheese, extra syrup, and coconut milk for the frosting) and beat on low with an electric mixer until everything is well combined.
  4. Pour into a greased and parchment-lines baking pan.
  5. Bake at 350 degrees for 30-35 minutes, until a toothpick comes out clean.
  6. Cool completely and frost with the Maple Cream Cheese Frosting.
  7. To make the frosting, bring the cream cheese to room temperature and beat well with the maple syrup and coconut milk.

 

“Monument” Chocolate Pie

I had hoped to get this recipe up yesterday since, you know, it would have been nice to get it ready for Easter.  But I didn’t and I really have no excuse.  My husband is, once again, about to leave on business tomorrow and so our Saturday was spent lounging in front of the TV together, debating whether or not we were going to watch the season premier of Game of Thrones or the finale of The Walking Dead tonight.  They’re seriously on at the SAME TIME.  In what kind of sadistic world does that happen?!

Oh, but then we had Brazilian BBQ last night and I think I ate my weight in steak and grilled pineapple.  And still had room for dessert…I discovered the secret to the most awesome Paleo S’mores ever: just cut a huge chunk of marshmallow, lay it on a plate, dump some chocolate chips on top, and set it under the broiler.  Yes, I will post about it.  So good.

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Know what else is good?  My “Monument” Chocolate Pie.  I’ve posted it before…couple times…but I made it again when my family was in town and made a few new tweaks.  This was the BEST one yet and I HAD to make sure I shared it with the world.  It’s been way too long since I’ve had the real thing from the Monument Cafe in G-town, but this baby brings back all the wonderful memories of Texas and the life we started there.  In a time of such transition, Austin remains on the top of our list of places we might like to end up…but for now, I guess I have to settle for a face-full of chocolatey, whipped creamy goodness.  Life is hard.

PS, I stopped trying to make my own pie crust recipes.  I suck at it.  This pie is awesome crust-less or with Mark’s Ultimate Walnut Pie Crust.

3.0 from 1 reviews

“Monument” Chocolate Pie
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Serves: 8
 

Ingredients
  • 2 Cans Full Fat Coconut Milk
  • ¼ t Sea Salt
  • ¼ c Arrowroot Powder
  • ⅓ c Honey
  • 2 T Vanilla
  • 1 bag (10 oz) Enjoy Life Chocolate Chunks (or any other semi-sweet chocolate chips)
  • 1 c Heavy Whipping Cream, whipped

Instructions
  1. Bring the coconut milk and salt to a boil over medium heat, stirring constantly.
  2. Whisk in honey and vanilla.
  3. Sift in the arrowroot powder, then remove from heat.
  4. Cool slightly for a minute or two, then whisk in the chocolate until melted.
  5. Beat with an electric mixer for another 3 minutes to add some air and smooth out the texture.
  6. Cool the custard in the fridge for 30 minutes.
  7. Pour into a prepared crust (see note above) crust
  8. You may have some filling left over like I always do…just pour it in a mug and chill in the fridge for a late-night snack.
  9. Refrigerate for at lease 4 hours or overnight, then spread the whipped cream on top before serving.

 

Super Simple, Super Chocolate Mousse

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Time for another Oldie!!  The last time I made this I called it Chocolate Morphine, remember?  Of course you don’t.  But holy crap, you guys…this needed to happen again.  Can I just say that, for the ladies among us, this luscious concoction is a cure for anything and everything that ails you–hormones, trouble at work, bad hair days…?  That’s a biological fact right there.  Trust me…I mean, I could totally be a doctor some day if I wanted to.

So I’m in DC this weekend visiting my bestest.  There will be lots of eating of chocolate and in all probability som outlandish wine consumption.  Go ahead, judge me…because when I get back ill be back in training mode for a competition in May.  I’m still on the fence about going to Nationals…but I figured a local gig wouldn’t hurt too much.  It’s a chance to see if I’m ready, learn a little bit, and see if I can still stand in those horrific shoes.  Plus it’s right here in CO so I don’t have to pay an arm and a leg to get there.  I’m poor.  And about to be jobless.  Which is actually why I’m here in DC–got a pretty hot-to-trot interview Monday, but I’m not going to say what it’s for because I’ll jinx it…I just know it.  I probably shouldn’t have even mentioned it.  Crap.  Now I WILL be homeless.  I need chocolate.

5.0 from 2 reviews

Super Simple, Super Chocolate Mousse
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Serves: 1-2
 

Ingredients
  • 1 can Full-Fat Coconut Milk, refrigerated a few hours or overnight
  • 2-3 T Cocoa Powder (depending on how rich you want it)
  • 2-3 T Maple Syrup or Honey (depending on how sweet you want it)
  • Toppings: whipped cream, carob chips, shredded coconut, dollop of almond butter, cinnamon, etc…

Instructions
  1. Chill the can of coconut milk, unopened, for a few hours or overnight.
  2. Open the can and scrape out the solidified cream layer into a bowl. Beat vigorously with a whisk or an electric mixer until softened. Add the honey and cocoa and beat until light and fluffy.
  3. Top with your garnishes of choice, and enjoy!

 

Rich Banana Chip Bundt Cake

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Yeah, regular “healthy” banana bread wasn’t going to cut it this week.  I needed CAKE, people.  Although I must have been high or something because I didn’t make any frosting for it.  I must be getting senile.  Moving for the third time in 10 months will do that to you.  I’m also working with another trainer who likes to change up my macros…a lot…and we all know I suck at math.  No, no…it’s a good thing.  But my head hurts.

So, cake.  I HIGHLY recommend you try goat yogurt.  Don’t knock it till you try it…really.  While cow’s dairy can cause some issues for people (I get acne and toxic farts…you?), goat’s dairy is a LOT more friendly to the human digestive system.  AND it gives a really nice, moist texture to this cake and a slight tang to counteract the sweetness.  Sort of like sour cream in many traditional cakes.  But I get it…if  you’re super duper dairy intolerant or just REALLY don’t want to use dairy, coconut oil is the perfect sub.

Know what’s good, too?  Dunk this stuff in coffee.  Or slather it in almond butter and stuff it in your face.  Or make some thin slices and toss em in the toaster oven (or on a cook top) until a little crispy, and then put maple syrup and butter on top.  OMFG.

Rich Banana Chip Bundt Cake
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Serves: 12
 

Ingredients
  • ¾ c Coconut Flour
  • 2 t Baking Soda
  • 1 t Cinnamon
  • 10 Eggs
  • 2 Really Ripe Bananas
  • ¾ c Goat’s Milk Yogurt (or Coconut Oil for a dairy-free option)
  • Juice and Zest of 1 Lemon
  • 1 t Almond Extract
  • ¼ Honey
  • 1 c Enjoy Life Chocolate Chips

Instructions
  1. Whisk together the dry ingredients.
  2. Add the wet ingredients.
  3. Beat with an electric mixer on high for 3 minutes, so the batter is nice and smooth.
  4. Pour into a prepared bundt pan (a large loaf pan is also fine).
  5. Bake at 350 degrees for 50-60 minutes.

 

Carob Chip Banana Protein Loaf

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I know I’m gonna get lynched for posting a recipe with whey, I just know it.  Don’t hate.  While dairy is not a staple in my diet, I do use whey protein and goat’s yogurt from time to time, so just deal with it, k?  I bet someone’s going to hate on me for using carob chips, too.  Not sure why you would, but every time I roll out some new ingredient I get some push-back.  OK, listen.  I happen to like carob chips a lot…I think they taste like little coffee-chocolate drops and that’s amazing.  And carob, unlike chocolate, is caffeine-free and doesn’t need any added sugar.  And you can make them yourself!  If you’re still going to pitch a fit over my use of whey and carob, use egg protein and regular chocolate chips instead.  Problem solved.

I made this bread because I a) reallyreallyreally wanted something chocolate and b) needed a quick breakfast/PWO snack on the run that was packed with protein.  In case you haven’t noticed, I’m a total meathead.  In fact, I haven’t worn any pants that weren’t either sweats or spandex in nature for…a month.  No, two months.  Wow.  I also haven’t touched a bra that wasn’t of the sports variety for even longer.  That’s saying something because I have teensy tiny boobies.  I probably look like a homeless person 99.99999% of the time.  Kinda sad.  No wonder I needed chocolate this week…

Carob Chip Banana Protein Loaf
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Serves: 8
 

Ingredients
  • ½ c Coconut Flour
  • 1 t Baking Soda
  • 1 t Cinnamon
  • 1 c Whey Protein Powder (preferably chocolate!)
  • 2 T Cocoa Powder
  • 1 T Lemon Juice (about half a lemon)
  • 6 Eggs
  • 3 Ripe Bananas
  • ½ c Carob Chips

Instructions
  1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.
  2. Beat all the ingredients except carob chips together until smooth.
  3. Fold in the carob chips.
  4. Pour batter into a greased loaf pan.
  5. Bake at 350 degrees for 1 hour.

 

Paleo Cinnabuns

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I know, I know…I’ll probably never be able to imitate the yeasty doughiness of wheat-based Cinnabuns.  It’s the gluten, you guys, it’s always the gluten that makes so many of my favorite things impossible to re-create.  Not just Cinnabuns, either, but croissants, phyllo dough, exploding tins of Grands biscuits…

But you know what?  I can have my morning cinnabun without…you know…having it explode out the other end.  TMI?

I think the best part of these, though, is the cream cheese frosting.  I could eat an old flip flop if it had cream cheese frosting on it.  I used the same frosting recipe I had for my Red Velvet Cupcakes last year, and it’s my favorite…if dairy is all good with you, then have at it, just use full fat organic stuff to avoid any nasty fillers.  If you’re not all about the dairy thang, no worries!  I got you covered…remember my Almond Butter Bacon Banana Donuts?  Silly me, of course you do…but the cinnamon cream frosting I made for those is cinnabun-friendly, too!  Oh, and raw almond butter with a drizzle of honey is KILLER as a frosting, too.

One more note on these–I am a HUGE fan of palm shortening in general, so naturally I’d encourage you to use it for this recipe if you can. It’s a highly stable saturated fat that will keep these babies nice and moist and won’t go rancid in the baking process.  I get mine direct from Tropical Traditions (beware, some other brands highly process their palm shortening and even add vegetable and soy oils), but if you absolutely must use something else, coconut cream concentrate or coconut oil are your best bets.

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Paleo Cinnabuns
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Serves: 6
 

Ingredients
  • ½ c Coconut Flour
  • 5 Eggs
  • ½ t Baking Soda
  • ½ c Palm Shortening
  • ¼ c Maple Syrup
  • 2 t Vanilla
  • 2 t Cinnamon
  • 1 T Palm Sugar
  • ¼ t Nutmeg
  • Frosting of Choice

Instructions
  1. With an electric mixer, cream the shortening and syrup.
  2. With the mixer running, add one egg at a time until blended.
  3. Add the vanilla.
  4. Combine the coconut flour, palm sugar, cinnamon, and baking soda in a separate bowl.
  5. Add the dry mixture bit by bit to the wet ingredients until fluffy and well blended.
  6. Spoon the batter into greased donut pan–you want to fill them to the top.
  7. Bake at 325 degrees for 15-20 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted comes out clean.
  8. Cool completely, then remove from the pan and frost as desired.

 

Strawberry Chocolate Fudge Torte w/ Sun Butter Mousse

It’s also Raw and Vegan, too…so it’s totally good enough to make a well-balanced breakfast ;-)

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You might remember a couple weeks ago, I had the most UH-mazing chocolate torte with peanut butter cream.  Well, this is my answer to that, duderinos.  Although why I chose to make a frozen version in January, I’ll never know.  I think all this moving business is going to my head.  In the not good way.  I’ve been wearing the same pair of Lulus for 4 days.  Ew.  You didn’t need to know that.

So…this dessert really reminds me of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich–you have to get one full bite with the nutty crst, strawberries, chocolate, and then the mousse…oh, the mousse.  Any nut butter will do (I be coconut butter would rock it…hmmm, just figured out my purpose in life today!) but I chose sunflower seed butter because, at least to me, it’s the closest in flavor to actual peanut butter.  Of all the beans and legumes, I wish peanuts were somehow magically not horrific for your guts.  Please?  I have some catching up to do…

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4.0 from 1 reviews

Strawberry Chocolate Fudge Torte w/ Sun Butter Mousse
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Serves: 8
 

Ingredients
  • 2 c Pecans or Walnuts
  • ¼ c Unsweetened Cocoa Powder
  • 2 T Coconut oil, melted
  • ¼ c Honey
  • 1 t Vanilla
  • ½ t Salt
  • 3 Avocados
  • ⅓ c Full Fat Coconut milk
  • ½ c Honey
  • 1 T Arrowroot Powder
  • ¼ t Salt
  • 1 t Vanilla
  • 10 oz Dark Chocolate Chips (I use Enjoy Life), melted in 1-2 Coconut Oil
  • ¼ c Unsweetened Cocoa
  • 1 c Diced Strawberries
  • 1 can Full Fat Coconut Milk
  • 2 T Sunflower Seed Butter
  • 1 T Honey

Instructions
  1. For the crust, place the pecans or walnuts in a food processor and grind into a coarse meal.
  2. Add ¼ c cocoa, melted coconut oil, ¼ c honey, vanilla, and salt, pulsing and wiping down the sides if the food processor with a spatula until well combined. Press into a baking dish or pie plate (I use a springform pan) and spread the diced strawberries on top.
  3. Place in the freezer while you prepare the filling.
  4. For the filling, puree the avocados in a food processor.
  5. Add the rest of the ingredients one at a time and blend until very smooth and creamy.
  6. Pour the filling over the crust and spread to even it out.
  7. Freeze for at least 6 hours or overnight before serving.
  8. For the mousse, chill the can of coconut milk for a few hours, then spoon out the solid portion into a bowl.
  9. Whip the coconut milk until the consistency of whipped cream.
  10. Add the sunflower seed butter and honey, then whip some more until well combined.
  11. Add a generous dollop to your torte.

 

Hazlenut Coconut Cookies (Sugar-Free)

I know, I know…I’m doing a sugar detox this month. How original. Whatever. But I was craving sugar like something fierce so I decided to make some cookies! Without the sugar. Boom. Cookies!!!

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And you know what? Vanilla and cinnamon and creamy coconut butter are AH-MAZING together. You don’t even need sweetener and I find myself wondering why I felt the need to put so much honey in my other recipes. Actually…I find myself wondering why I ever feel the need to put so much honey or maple syrup or palm sugar in a lot of the things I’ve made. There is most certainly a place for sweeteners in cooking (we all know how much I lovelovelove a sweet treat every now and then), but damn…we don’t have to sweeten friggin everything. Have you seen Triple D lately? There’s sugar in gravy, there’s sugar on bacon, there’s sugar on steak! I mean, WTF?? No wonder we’re all addicts…and I’m in the midst of a very real Low-Carb-Flu to prove it.

Thankfully these hit the spot while still being completely sugar free. Just hoping my body doesn’t figure it out anytime soon. If you’re not doing a detox, you can add 1/3 c maple syrup and whatever other goodies you want (chocolate chips, anyone?).  I made my original batch with almond meal and walnuts, but then I did another one that was hazlenut flour-based and had pecans instead of walnuts as the secondary nut…OMFG.  If you can find it, I highly recommend using hazlenut flour–or just make your own like I did in a food processor.    But any combination of nuts and nut flours will work…go nuts!

PS…I finally gave in.  Like me on Facebook!

INGREDIENTS

**Printable Recipe**

2 c Hazlenut Meal

1 t Baking Soda

1 c Pecans, ground in a food processor

1/2 c Unsweetened Shredded Coconut

1/2 c Ground Flax

1 t Cinnamon

2 Eggs

1 t Vanilla

1/2 c Coconut Oil

1/2 c Coconut Butter

INSTRUCTIONS

Mix together the wet ingredients. Then Combine the dry ingredients in a separate mixing bowl. Add to the wet mixture by spoonfuls, beating until smooth. Drop by large spoonfuls onto a greased cookie sheet. Bake at 325 for 15 minutes, until lightly browned on top. These are best eaten piping hot from the oven!!

Makes 16 large cookies.